Who hasn’t heard of a comb-over, especially now with Donald Trump all over the news for his no-holds-barred run in the Republican presidential sweepstakes.
A comb-over is used by men of a certain age group to compensate for shortcomings at the highest level. It basically involves taking the few remaining strands of hair atop the head and arranging them in such a way that they cover as much territory as is humanly possible.
The usual result is a sloppy mess that fools no one except the balding middle-age man trying desperately to cling to his lost youth.
Someone like Trump thinks a bad comb-over gives him license to insult the looks of others. Rosie O’Donnell and Carly Fiorina have both undeservedly felt the wrath of Trump. Rosie carries a few extra pounds but who doesn’t? And Carly has some mileage on her, but remains an attractive woman.
Comb-over violence is rare
As pathetic as comb-overs may be, the almost never cause an outburst of violence. The same thing cannot be said, however, about something called the honk-over.
The honk-over happens when a motorist honks his horn not at the driver directly in front of him, but at someone two or three places in front who acts improperly during a traffic jam by not moving his vehicle fast enough.
It’s understandable that tempers are short during traffic tie-ups and driver’s are sorely tempted to express frustration by sounding the horn. The problem is that no one can tell who is being honked at except the honker himself.
Such a scenario recently escalated to the point where punches were exchanged amid snarled traffic on a clogged Midwestern roadway. A driver took exception to the honking taking place directly behind him and got out of his car.
At first he merely pounded his fist on the hood of the honker’s car. That was enough to bring a reaction. The mad honker also threw his vehicle into park, got out and confronted the hood-pounding hot head.
Insults and threats exchanged
They stood nose to nose for a bit and shouted insults and threats at each other. Then one shoved the other and the donnybrook was in full swing.
A third driver who saw the whole thing got out of his car and tried to separate the two flailing motorists. Another driver put in a call to 9-1-1 from his cell phone.
Fortunately, cooler heads prevailed and by the time police worked their way through the traffic and reached the scene, the fighters had thrown in the towel and gone back to their cars.
After talking to the parties involved and questioning two or three witnesses, officers declined to make an arrest or issue citations.
After all, despite the fisticuffs, hardly a hair on the combatants’ well-coiffed heads was out of place.